5 Ways To Communication With Intention

Posted on July 1, 2020 Posted by Anna Washington

5 Ways To Communication With Intention

“A gift consists not in what is done or given, but in the intention of the giver or doer.”

-Lucius Annaeus Seneca

How to say what we mean without picking a fight

We all have intentions. Face it- whether ill or good is of consequence one way or the other, but we all have them just the same.

It’s ok to admit it, really. We all know it but still, we act surprised as can be when it slaps us in the face. But, what if everyone just finally grew a set and said what they really meant?

Tissue sales would triple, assaults would spike, jails and hospitals fill to their limit, and a whole mess of hurt feelings remains.

Wow! Maybe not such an aggressive path.

There is a simpler way to healthy, productive communication. One where each individual involved feels like they’ve been both included and heard and everyone walks away better off, or…

The other, in which one person carelessly picks a fight over trying to control the situation and “have it their way.”

 

Which one would you prefer? Civilized or Chaotic?

Speak now or forever hold a grudge

We are all familiar with the feeling of being railroaded or coerced into a situation or agreement we don’t necessarily feel comfortable. Sometimes, it is a matter of authority versus diminutive such as laws and institutional rules. But sometimes, it is that we did not speak our mind clearly.

At the start of any relationship, we have a choice to make. We can either:

 

  • Speak our truth and set healthy boundaries for ourselves
  • Hold our feelings and words and suffer with what we get

 

Not a whole lot of wiggle room there. We either be part of the creation process or we essentially relinquish all say. Or at least, we have a huge uphill battle to regain our control once we’ve frivolously pissed it away.

One thing is for sure, if you chose to roll the dice and give up your power in setting the tone, there will come a day when you ended up feeling resentment towards either yourself, your partner, or both.

 

Civil debate & conversation tips for healthier relationships

So, we know we need to set healthy boundaries based on our personal beliefs and moral code, right?

Yet, how do we know what those are? How do we find a compromise differences arise? And, how do we communicate those sentiments to others in an open and positive manner?

5 Ways to Communicate with Intention

  1. Stay Calm: Anytime things get stressful, we can all tend to get a bit edgy. Oftentimes, we get so riled up about things that we make a tricky situation worse by catching an attitude or taking immediate offense. Take a deep breath and remain calm.
  2. Remain Open-minded: Too often once we’ve heard something we disagree with, we instantly shut down and dig our heels in. By refusing to further communicate, not only have we lost our chance at finding a compromise but we may have also incidentally closed all options to us in doing so.
  3. Have a Plan: Know what you want going into it. Sounds easy, right? But, the sad reality (and the reason this made the list) is that most of us are not fully in-tune with our internal feelings and desires. We think we know. Yet, most of the time we are merely reacting to the situation after the fact.
  4. Communicate Your Expectations:  Right, we all know expectations are just invited disappointments. However, when engaging in a debate or compromise or negotiation, one has to have some set idea of their desired outcome without having too much attachment to the exact plan. This way we know what we want, what we’re willing to give up, and what we are willing to trade off.
  5. Be Firm Yet Fair: When we are talking about our personal boundaries and moral reservations, our needs, and desires it can be tough to let something go to compromise. We might feel we are losing our say. Still, when you take a step back and look at the bigger picture, what we should be shooting for is an even trade off. So if our partner wants us to stay home on Friday nights, and we want to go to a concert in a few weeks then perhaps suggest to stay in with the exception of that particular night. Or offer to spend other time together and give specific ideas, not just vague answers.

 

*One added thought:  Be prepared to listen as much as you talk, give as much as you take, and above all else…Speak with compassion and understanding and love.

Communication with the ones we love, or even the ones we work with or for can be a tricky track. Especially so, when we have an emotional or vested interest in the subject and/or outcome.

However, by starting openly and honestly to communicate our intentions and saying what we need to say without starting a fight or instigating bad blood or emotions can satisfy even the toughest of compromises.

If all parties to the discussion act in a positive, open-minded, and communicative manner there is no mountain too high to have to climb to be successful.

5 Ways To Communication With Intention

Posted on July 1, 2020 Posted by Anna Washington

11 Ways To Create A Positive Mindset on a Film or Show Set

How positive thinking leads to a happier life

It has been proven that positive thinking leads to a happier life; or at the absolute least, it makes hard times more tolerable. So, why are you still clinging to that Eeyore-style, humdrum, negative mentality?

Most of us want to live a life full of happiness and fulfillment, yet few of us truly understand what that is.

How many of you can say that you’re happy?

  • 100% of the time
  • 90%
  • 80%
  • 75%
  • 50%
  • Less?

Why? You deserve happiness and a life of positive fulfillment. Don’t you agree? Then, why settle for less than the bliss you deserve?

The fallacy of achieving happiness

It is an antiquated philosophy to think that being happy or having a happy life starts somewhere outside of ourselves.

To believe that our positive mindset and happiness is the result of some set of mysterious circumstances beyond our control is not only preposterous, but it will have us chasing after an intangible dream, destined to fail.

Happiness can only be found within ourselves. It is not the result of having what we want but in truly appreciating what we have. It is found in accepting what is and isn’t and being satisfied.

If you’ll note, I didn’t say that you shouldn’t strive for more. But, in order to live a happy life, it is first important to adopt the right mindset, a positive mindset.

By transforming our typical negative outlook into one of positivity and optimism, we open ourselves to the possibilities life holds.

 

Your thoughts become things, choose wisely

If our thoughts manifest in the material world, then doesn’t it make more sense to choose good ones?

I mean, do any of you really enjoy being negative or living a life that is less than happy?

Isn’t it time to ditch that negative mindset and usher in a brand new way of thinking? Isn’t it time for you to  take back control of your own life and live it happily?

If you answered yes, then please read on for a list of 11 Ways to Transform Your Negative Mindset.

 

11 Ways to Transform Your Negative Mindset

  1. Stop Comparing: Focus on your strengths and know what you are best at. Do not waste time trying to be better than someone else, just do your thing! If you are driven to be your best version of you, then what someone else can do does NOT matter. How pretty another woman is, does NOT matter! What someone else is good at does NOT matter. What DOES matter? You and all of your wonderful gifts you have to offer.
  2. Meditate & Breathe: Take time each day to focus on your breathing, to be still, and to return inwards to the very core of you. Being at peace with yourself is the first step towards being happy with yourself. Learning to listen to your inner-voice is essential to transforming a negative mindset into a positive one.
  3. Serve Somebody: Yes, helping others not only helps them but also ourselves. When we do something to help others, it not only increases our self-esteem, but it reminds us of our usefulness. For some, charitable works are a life calling and for others it is just a way to show appreciation for all that we have. Either way, it will boost our self-image and increase our openess to the idea that we are enough.
  4. Talk to a Friend: Our friends are our best support network. The same can be said of our families. However, our friends will laugh with us, cry with us, encourage us, and tell us the truth when we need it. Talking to friends is a great way to transform our negativity. Whether it’s coffee with the girls or guys night out, our friends remind us that we are valued and treasured for who we truly are.
  5. Make a Gratitude List: Make a list of all of the things in your life that you are blessed and grateful for. Be sure to include not only things that you have, but also things that you have learned, opportunities you’ve been given. Remind yourself that everything in life is a blessing or a lesson and that even those lessons are blessings in disguise.
  6.  Exercise: A healthy mindset requires a healthy body. And studies have shown the positive mental health effects of exercise to be numerous. For instance, certain types of exercise improve cognitive function and mental acuity. In other words, certain activity can actually rewire the way our brain connects and change the way it works.
  7. Eat Healthy: Yep, mom and your Health Ed teachers were right! A healthy diet leads to a healthy mind and body. What you eat can affect your overall mood, but did you know that your mood can also affect what you choose to eat? The Harvard Health Blog states that Serotonin, a key neurotransmitter that helps to regulate sleep & eating patterns, inhibit pain, and also mediate mood swings is produced primarily in the body’s gastrointestinal tract. Essentially, what foods you digest dictate how you digest life.
  8. Fresh Air=Fresh Mind: Gettng outdoors for some fresh air can do us wonders. The benefits of exercise aside, fresh air helps to oxygenate our blood leading to better cardiovascular health. Not to mention the goodness of Vitamin D that comes from healthy exposure to the sun. All of this goodness combined with the benefit of not being cooped-up and avoiding the dreaded “cabin fever” or seasonal affective disorder will certainly help to transform a negative mindset.
  9. Drink Water: Staying hydrated is a neccessity here in Arizona, but it is also pivotal in our overall health. The human body is comprised of over 60% water and our hydration has a host of health benefits that include weight loss, skin health, muscle efficiency, and many others on top of…you guessed it- balancing our mood!
  10. Laugh Now/Cry Also: The health benefits of laughter are common sense but include a decrease in stress hormones in the body and also an increase in infection causing antibodies. However, did you know that 85% of women and 73% of men feel better after a good cry? Don’t worry, noone’s watching. Let it out! Your mood will lighten and your brain will thank you.
  11. Keep a Journal: Journal writing can be both rewarding and theraputic. Whether we write daily or on occasion as needed, getting the weight of the world off our minds can do great things towards our mental outlook on life. No one has to read the words we write, but getting it out of our heads helps us to process our emotions. So, if you can’t find a friend to listen, then write it down. You can burn it afterwards and visualize your worry and stress being transformed and whisked away in the smoke.

Transform your negative mindset to create a happy life

These are just a few ways in which we can cultivate a life of happiness and positivity for ourselves. Find what works for you and start today to create a positive mindset in which you can stress less, live more, and enjoy this life.

We would love to hear your stories and tips on maintaining a positive mindset or overcoming negativity. If this article speaks to you, please share it with your social media circles, and comment below! Don’t forget to sign up on our mailing list for more helpful tips on how to live a happier, more positive life and how to create the best version of you ever!